Requirements for Getting Married
Legally, what is marriage?
Marriage is a private bond between two people, but it is also an important social institution. Most states define marriage as a civil contract between a man and a woman to become husband and wife.
The moment a man and a woman marry, their relationship acquires a legal status. Married couples have financial and personal duties to each other during marriage and after separation or divorce. State laws determine the extent of these duties. As the U.S. Supreme Court said about marriage in 1888: “The relation once formed, the law steps in and holds the parties to various obligations and liabilities.”
Society recognizes marriage in several ways:
As a way to express commitment, strengthen intimate bonds, and provide mutual emotional support.
As a (comparatively) stable structure within which to raise children.
As a financial partnership in which spouses may choose from a variety of roles. Both spouses may work inside or outside the home to support the family, or the husband may support the wife, or the wife may support the husband.
As our society becomes more complex, there is no longer a short answer to the question “What is marriage?” Definitions and opinions of the proper functions of marriage continue to change. The women’s rights movement and gay rights movement have resulted in more equal treatment of men and women and the creation of new legal relationships, including domestic partnerships and civil unions for same-sex couples. The traditional concept of marriage remains, but it continues to evolve.
What are the legal requirements for getting married?
The requirements are simple, although they vary from state to state. In general, a man and a woman wishing to marry must obtain a license in the state in which they wish to be married, usually from a county clerk, a city clerk, or a a clerk of court. The fee usually is low.
Parties who wish to marry must have the capacity to do so. This means that neither can be married to someone else, the parties must be of a certain age, and both must understand that they are being married and what it means to be married. If, because of drunkenness, mental illness, or some other problem, one of the parties lacks capacity, the marriage will not be valid.
A few states require the man and the woman to have blood tests for venereal disease before the license is issued, although most do not require a blood test. In states that require a blood test, some will not issue a license if one or both of the parties have venereal disease, while others will allow the marriage if the couple knows the disease is present.
In a few states, a couple must show proof of immunity or vaccination for certain diseases or completion of a general physical examination.
Close blood relatives cannot marry, although in some states, first cousins can marry. Of those states that allow first cousins to marry, a few states also require that one of the cousins be unable to conceive children.
Some states require a waiting period, generally three days, between the time the license is issued and the time of the marriage ceremony.

At what age may people marry?
A man or woman may marry at age eighteen without parental consent. Most states also allow persons age sixteen and seventeen to marry with consent of their parents or a judge.
When does a couple become married?
Most states consider a couple to be married when the ceremony ends, when the officiating person says “I now pronounce you husband and wife.” Failure to have sexual relations (lack of consummation) does not affect the validity of the marriage. In all states, the proper official must record the marriage license. Recording the marriage license is proof that the marriage happened.
Is a particular type of marriage ceremony required?
No, there is broad latitude regarding the type of ceremony required. A marriage ceremony may be religious or civil. The person or persons conducting the ceremony should indicate that the man and woman agree to be married. A religious ceremony should be conducted under the customs of the religion, or, in the case of a Native American group, the tribe. Most states require one or two witnesses to sign the marriage certificate.
Are common-law marriages allowed?
In most states, no. In times past, particularly in the frontier days, it was common for states to consider a woman and man to be married if they lived together for a certain length of time, had sexual intercourse, and held themselves out as husband and wife, even though they never went through a marriage ceremony. Today, only nine states recognize common-law marriages. In those states, in order for there to be a legal common-law marriage, the partners must clearly represent themselves to others as being husband and wife; merely living together is not enough to create a marriage.
In states that recognize a common-law marriage, the partners have the same rights and duties as if there had been a ceremonial marriage. Most other states will accept as valid a common-law marriage that began in a state that recognizes common-law marriage.
A legal common-law marriage may end only with a formal divorce. There is no such thing as a “common-law divorce.”
What is a domestic partnership?
Some cities have passed laws providing for domestic partnerships, which can apply to homosexual couples, and heterosexual couples, who are living together without being married. To become domestic partners, the partners must register their relationship at a government office and declare that they are in a “committed” relationship. Domestic partnerships provide some–but not all–of the legal benefits of marriage. Some of the common benefits are the right to coverage on a family health insurance policy, the right to family leave to take care of a sick partner (to the same extent a person would be able to use family leave to care for a sick spouse), bereavement leave, visiting rights to hospitals and jails, and rent control benefits (to the same extent a spouse would retain reduced rent if his or her partner died.)
Does a woman’s last name change automatically when she gets married?
No. A woman’s name changes only if she wants it changed. In the past, a woman would often change her last name to her husband’s name when she married. Now society recognizes a woman’s right to take her husband’s name, keep her original name, or use both names. The general rule is that if a woman uses a chosen name consistently and honestly, then it will be recognized as her true name. The details on how to change a name can be found in the sidebar entitled “What’s in a Name?”
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